my life sucks

What should i do if i ever seee him with his brand new fon? Act cool lik nothing ever happen or just be myself? Just imagine A 12 year old got a chance to change his sister’s old, out dated 3310 fon too a brand new 3230 wit camera, video, bluetooth, internet and all sorts of shit function u wan..wat do u think he wil do? Sure act in front of his sister rite? What will u do if u were in my place? I hope i can get my license soon and get away from here as far as i could..yea... many have told me to just act cool lik nothing ever happen..just pretend that i don see a thing...hello...this is tze ching u r talkin bout..its easy to say... but hard to do...its so unfair..its lucky ebough for him to own a fon at the age of 12,.. oh ya.. thinking back.. when did i get my official FIRST fon?? This year.. wit my own MONEY...for those who donno, the fon that i had previously use belongs to my grandma..i just sort of ‘borrow’ it from her..coz she not using it...a few thousand ringgit fon for him coz he get straught A’s in his upsr?? Lolz... me too.. but what did i get?? Just because he is the only BOY in a CHINESE family doesnt mean that he can get a better treatment.. hello..im your daughter.. whether u lik it or not ... im still your daughter...its not my fault that im born a GIRL... i can do nothing to change it... ever wonder y im so rebellious at home??? Isit my fault that im rebellious... me too.. don like my beheaviour..what can i do to change it? Its naturall.. i ve tried,.. but i cant...yea.. he’s a BOY and is good in his studies.. im a girl and always get bad grades.. i fail half of my subjects in skol...do u think that i WANTED to fail? No matter how hard i tried, i just cant get add math...same time next year, i will be finishing my spm..what should i do? If u guys don understabd me, please don act lik u do..i want to pass me spm.. i don wan to fail even for a subject..with the grades i have this year, i dunno wat will my result be..

I cant imagine chinese new year..when all the grand uncles and aunties, and all the sampat relatives say when they see it..im sure that nex cny will be a great dissapointment for me. Again.. even bigger than this...ish... i feeeelll lik i wan to slap him...

This proves that me and my brother just wont get along well.. no matter what happens..don ask me to say “ wow!! Nice fon u got there.. even better than mine.. no.. much much better than mine..” it will be a miracle if i could say that...

* i need help* -dying-

i HATE MY LIFE!!!!